Sunday, July 06, 2008
Your dreams are never silly;
Depend on them to guide you.
That's what my fortune cookie said last night, and although I'm not one to really base my life on such tiny words on a small slip of paper, I think it's good advice.
It couldn't have come at a better time, because I really needed to hear that.
It's always surprised me how much and with little effort -- even when younger and debatably more reckless -- I've always been able to fire up support in others.
It has been so easy for me to just reach out and grab an idea, and so many have run with me, even at times when I silently wasn't completely sure what I was doing.
It's precisely that which makes Now so hard. For the longest time I've thought as soon as I figured out what it was I wanted to do, things would get easier: the rest would follow.
I've chosen. At times, yes, I'm scared. I know it will not be easy. Sure, I could get a less fulfilling job, or just head out and try to make money.
But I want to make a difference, as cheesy as it sounds, and I could never have foreseen how much effort I would have to expend to defend that idea.
I know I don't have to choose this. I know I don't have to be some kind of martyr; it's just that, I don't see it that way. I see it as part of a path to something greater: a first-hand experience to engage my consciousness and propel me into the future.
Give me something to learn. Give me something to write about, other than some general knowledge I could soak up and expel from a book. Give me something tangible. More importantly, give me a chance.
I know I'm strong, but I want to find out how strong, because I've got a feeling I could do more. I always want to.
Give me the vernacular to express that experience; to engage others in a dialog, and to append my credibility.
Maybe I do have something to prove. So what? That's so much more than so many ever have.
Depend on them to guide you.
That's what my fortune cookie said last night, and although I'm not one to really base my life on such tiny words on a small slip of paper, I think it's good advice.
It couldn't have come at a better time, because I really needed to hear that.
It's always surprised me how much and with little effort -- even when younger and debatably more reckless -- I've always been able to fire up support in others.
It has been so easy for me to just reach out and grab an idea, and so many have run with me, even at times when I silently wasn't completely sure what I was doing.
It's precisely that which makes Now so hard. For the longest time I've thought as soon as I figured out what it was I wanted to do, things would get easier: the rest would follow.
I've chosen. At times, yes, I'm scared. I know it will not be easy. Sure, I could get a less fulfilling job, or just head out and try to make money.
But I want to make a difference, as cheesy as it sounds, and I could never have foreseen how much effort I would have to expend to defend that idea.
I know I don't have to choose this. I know I don't have to be some kind of martyr; it's just that, I don't see it that way. I see it as part of a path to something greater: a first-hand experience to engage my consciousness and propel me into the future.
Give me something to learn. Give me something to write about, other than some general knowledge I could soak up and expel from a book. Give me something tangible. More importantly, give me a chance.
I know I'm strong, but I want to find out how strong, because I've got a feeling I could do more. I always want to.
Give me the vernacular to express that experience; to engage others in a dialog, and to append my credibility.
Maybe I do have something to prove. So what? That's so much more than so many ever have.
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