Monday, May 30, 2005
My Camp Has a First Name ...
so i'm out in gonzales now to work. have been since saturday. here are some new developments that kinda rule:
1. I quit smoking. I. Fucking. Quit.
2. I am running again.
You know what's weird about being here, and was kind of hard to admit? Camp's always been the regrouping time of year for me. It's always been the thing I do that happens to fall right when everything else in my life seems to be going to shit, or when I'm burning out.
I don't feel that way right now, and I'm not sure what to do with it other than have a really excellent time. Which is not something to complain about by the way, and I'm so not. It's just different.
Now all I hope is that the life I loved and had to leave for awhile won't fall to pieces before I get back. That fear seems natural to have when you're not used to feeling happiness consistently over an extended period of time. But I'm not actually that worried. It's just like I get to enjoy another life for a little while.
I didn't come here last year, but this place still feels like home, even though the fact that I didn't come last year means it has actually been two years since I was here last. So it's got me thinking, just a little, about the me from two years ago, since that's the me quite of few of my coworkers knew. It's kind of interesting. There really have been a lot of changes ...
I'm so rambling. But ...
Good night.
so i'm out in gonzales now to work. have been since saturday. here are some new developments that kinda rule:
1. I quit smoking. I. Fucking. Quit.
2. I am running again.
You know what's weird about being here, and was kind of hard to admit? Camp's always been the regrouping time of year for me. It's always been the thing I do that happens to fall right when everything else in my life seems to be going to shit, or when I'm burning out.
I don't feel that way right now, and I'm not sure what to do with it other than have a really excellent time. Which is not something to complain about by the way, and I'm so not. It's just different.
Now all I hope is that the life I loved and had to leave for awhile won't fall to pieces before I get back. That fear seems natural to have when you're not used to feeling happiness consistently over an extended period of time. But I'm not actually that worried. It's just like I get to enjoy another life for a little while.
I didn't come here last year, but this place still feels like home, even though the fact that I didn't come last year means it has actually been two years since I was here last. So it's got me thinking, just a little, about the me from two years ago, since that's the me quite of few of my coworkers knew. It's kind of interesting. There really have been a lot of changes ...
I'm so rambling. But ...
Good night.
0 Comments:
